Not Ready to Succeed

I’ve just sent out my finished manuscript (ARCs) to people for endorsement. Gulp. Not only is this my art that I’m asking them to critique, this is my story. My life. My identity.

Writing a memoir is painful — at least it was for me. Many mornings before the sun rose, I could be found crying at my computer. I begged God to help me make sense of my past and communicate it in such a way that it might be a help to the reader. Or readers, if I got lucky.

Now, I’m hearing from my publisher’s sales team that pre-orders from book stores are going very well. At my very first book signing June 25, I’ll be video taped and interviewed by several media outlets. This is wonderful and terrifying. I don’t feel ready to succeed. I’m looking at God going, “Me? Really?” Doesn’t He know how undeserving I am?When You're Not Ready to Succeed | sarahkovac.com

Part of me has to laugh that all this attention comes as I enter my 8th month of pregnancy. I’m not feeling exactly glamorous as I’m waddling around the house in pajama pants all day. (Please God, help me find something nice to wear for the cameras!) And I still can’t believe that people would be interested in hearing about a life that seems boring to me, as the one living it.

But that’s the great thing about all this. The pressure’s not on me. I don’t have to be the most brilliant writer or be a size double zero for the cameras. God gave me this story to write, and the desire to write it. His timing is perfect, and I can humbly accept His direction even when I feel unfit and out of place.

 

This post is a Saturday Sprint.

4 thoughts on “Not Ready to Succeed

  1. Kaila says:

    Sara, you have this way with people. From the first time I met you I have never felt uncomfortable because you are naturally welcoming and do easy to talk to!! The gift of writing was given to you by God!! Whatever you write about its him working through you, even if you think you are writing something that doesn’t seem exciting, it is!!!! I’m so excited to read your book!!!! And I hope I get to see the live interviews because you are a natural!!!! Just be you because you are amazing!!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.